Where your "shoulds" came from

Lesson one. Where your "shoulds" came from. Trace your beliefs about success and work back to family, school, culture, workplaces, and the places you grew up. A "should" is a rule about how you ought to live that came from somewhere else: "I should have a stable job by now", "I should be further along". Most were planted early, by family, school, culture and work, before you could choose. A should isn't wrong because it was handed to you. But while it runs unchecked, it speaks for you. Naming where each one came from turns it from a fact into a choice. Why it matters. You can't express what's truly yours while old voices speak through you. Finding them gives your own voice room. For example. "I should never quit" may sound like a parent who stayed in one job for forty years. Or: "I should post every day" may sound like the internet, not like you. Where this leads. Stage 2 clears the noise, so you can hear what's really yours. This lesson finds the voices. Hold on to this. Most of what you think you want was planted before you could choose. That doesn't make it wrong. It makes it worth checking.